Random Thoughts for the Day . . .

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day...What a waste!

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the heck do I respond to that?

19. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

20. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night, more kisses begin with Miller Lite than with Kay.

I received this in an email and had a good laugh.

A MOTHER'S DICTIONARY

Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am too.

Defense: What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let the children play outside.

Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.

Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

Family planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster

Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.

Full name: What you call your child when you're mad at him.

Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Independent: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

Look out: What it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.

Prenatal: When your life was still somewhat your own.

Prepared childbirth: A contradiction in terms.

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

Show off: A child who is more talented than yours.

Sterilize: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.

Storeroom: The distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.

Temper tantrums: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.

Top bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

Two-minute warning: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.

Verbal: Able to whine in words

Whodunit: None of the kids that live in your house.

Whoops: An exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge."

TAKE TIME...

POSITIVE THINKING...

I am trying to stay positive...I am tired of the rain, no sick of the rain and I need to see the sun.

But...

So, I am trying to enjoy the winter knowing it will only make the spring and summer that much better. ; )

TWO MORE DAYS...

OF WORK....

OF COURSE TO THOSE OF YOU WHO WORK

NORMAL DAYS AND HOURS

HERE'S TO YOU NOW.

SHHHHH...

QUOTE

DIRECTIONS...

THOUGHTS

All kidding aside...I have seen money come in the jail and trust me you do not want to touch it. So...for the new year I suggest you all carry some of this with you...
and use it often!!

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

There may be days

when you get up in the morning

and things aren't the way

you had hoped they would be.

~

That's when you have to

tell yourself that things will get better.

There are times when people

disappoint you and let you down.

~

But those are the times

when you must remind yourself

to trust your own judgments and opinions,

to keep your life focused on believing in yourself.

~

There will be challenges to face

and changes to make in your life,

and it is up to you to accept them.

~

Constantly keep yourself headed

in the right direction for you.

It may not be easy at times,

but in those times of struggle

you will find a stronger sense of who you are.

~

So when the days come that are filled

with frustration and unexpected responsibilities,

remember to believe in yourself

and all you want your life to be.

~

Because the challenges and changes

will only help you to find the goals

that you know are meant to come true for you.

~

Keep Believing in You!

QUOTES

IT'S OKAY...

TO FAIL...

AS LONG AS WE LEARN THE LESSON

CELEBRATE LIFE

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, Cleveland , Ohio

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.

It is the most-requested column I've ever written.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43.. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.."

JUST BECAUSE...

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.

So love the people who treat you right.

Love the ones who don't just because you can.

Believe everything happens for a reason.

If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.

If it changes your life, let it.

Kiss slowly.

Forgive quickly.

God never said life would be easy.

He just promised it would be worth it.

ENJOY THE RIDE, THERE IS NO RETURN TICKET

George Carlin's views on aging.

IF YOU DON'T READ THIS TO THE VERY END,

YOU HAVE LOST A DAY IN YOUR LIFE.

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

'How old are you?' ' I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life ! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them.'

2 Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge .

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them , at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,

but by the moments that take our breath away .

THOUGHTS

Dream as if you'll live forever . . .

Live as if you'll die today.

Australian Prime Minister does it again!!

This should be a world wide rule. If you want to move to any country and become part of that country...WELCOME, But if want to change anything in that new country you wish to live in ...GOODBYE

It took a lot of courage for this man to speak what he had to say for the world to hear. The retribution could be phenomenal, but at least he was willing to take a stand on his and Austrilia's beliefs. Yes, allow those that want to come, to come. But understand that if you want to go to a country not of your birth, you should expect to live by their rules and respect their ways of life. This doesn't mean you have to give up yours. I think he explains it very well.

Prime Minister Kevin Rudd - Australia

Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told to get out of Australia , as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks..

Separately, Rudd angered some Australian Muslims by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation's mosques. Quote:

'IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave It. I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali , we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians. '

'This culture has been developed over two centuries of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom'

'We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society . Learn the language!'

'Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right wing, political push, but a fact, because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture.'

'We will accept your beliefs, and will not question why. All we ask is that you accept ours, and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us.'

'This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom, 'THE RIGHT TO LEAVE.'

'If you aren't happy here then LEAVE. We didn't force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted.'

I agree!!!!

I'VE LEARNED...

I've learned

..... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person

I've learned

.... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned

.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned

.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned

.... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned

..... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned

.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned

.....That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned

.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned

..... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned

.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned

.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned

..... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned

... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned

.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned

.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned

.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned

.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned

.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned

... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned

.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned

.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned

.... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I've learned

.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned

..... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned

.... That when your newly born child holds your little finger in their little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned

.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

I've learned

.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

ME JUST THINKING...

DON'T EVER,

EVER

APPOLIGIZE

FOR WHO

YOU ARE...

DON'T EVER LET

SOMEONE

MAKE YOU FEEL

LESS THAN YOU KNOW

YOU ARE!!!

I NEED THIS...

...TODAY, THIS WEEK...THE REST OF MY LIFE.